I like that they were shaming the artist at first and then realize that they shouldn't do that.
I like that as soon as other's saw that he did NSFW art, the artist did not want to be seen. A lot of NSFW artist, especially animators, don't show their faces, or even use their voice (when/if they stream.) Most want total Anonymity, whereas SFW/Traditional Artists want the opposite, they WANT to be known. LOL I find that hilarious within itself.
Then the two wanted to get into it, but for all the wrong reasons. Money. Do it for the love of it, not the money. That's the message I took from it. Most do it for the love of the art-form. You can't take money with you when you leave Earth, but you can leave something on Earth that will last longer than money.
Then they study and realize that it is too much for them because TMI. They Study sexy things and got overloaded with booba. Which I like because a lot of things aren't made for everyone, and not a lot of people are cut out to be a NSFW artist (like the two characters in this animation, they thought it was easy), and people should respect the people that can do it.
Also, I find it hilarious, because even the most skilled NSFW artist will get burnt out and stop eventually. It's taxing, some take a break, do other projects, and come back to it. If that was the message you were trying to convey then I agree, because it is hard to do nothing but NSFW all the time and people will assume that is the only thing you can do.
The origin of Hentai meant Pervert in Japanese. If you don't know that fact about the word, then it may come off as insulting enjoyers of NSFW Art, when he dubbed over and replaced it with pervert, but I don't think it was the intent.
I don't think the childlike character is a problem because they stated that he is in college.
Here's a little tip to add build up and tension: When Bro 1 asks, "Hey little bro, whatcha up to my man?" Don't show the art, but just the reaction. Then the audience is guessing what it is. Then he calls over Bro 2, and then show the art he drew, and then have the same reaction.
I found it funny that a Furry character was drawing NSFW Humans. I was expecting furry art, vore, dickgirls, or something vulgar, but it was something relatively normal and they made a huge fuss at first. LOL Unless the joke wasn't about drawing NSFW art per se, but a furry drawing a human, which would be the vice versa response if IRL a person drew furry porn and their "bros" saw. (Maybe one of the bros grabs the tablet and looks at his other stuff, so that the joke is clearer to the audience why the bros think he is perverted.)
I think it could've ended better, maybe the NSFW artist coming back into the room, and seeing them on the floor and the other two say the him, "Hey, it may be pervy, but you got some serious talent kid, don't be ashamed, don't hide your face, but also draw other stuff once in a while." Idk, I don't have a big bro, I'm assuming that's something a big bro would say. lol
The message could've been clearer, but I thought it was very good.